It was Hari Raya Eidul Fitri or Hari Lebaran 2022.
I had a call with my Mamsie and Papa.
Papa was crying and said that he didn't give me enough.
He said all he gave me was just sending me to school all the way to graduate school.
I took a pause.
Papa and Mama did a lot for me that I can't pay back in numeration. Gak kebayar jasa Papa Mama tuh deh.
Gue lahir tuh cute banget, sampe mamsie suka pamerin gue ke tetangga2 kalo jemuran pagi. Papa suka banget pulang kerja buat gendong2 gue. So much love, hugs, sweet words and various nicknames.
During my elementary years in Dumai (Riau, Sumatera), my parents let me have so many puppies, my dog RongRong seemed to keep breeding with Bobo, Shorty and Panther.
There was an adopted wild siamang/monkey that kept coming for food from the woods.
My mama one day traded 3 of our puppies along with a box of cigarettes and a kilo of salt with a bear cub. The orang asli (native nomad tribe of Sakai) came to our house attracted by my dogs. Orang Sakai always have dogs for hunting in the woods. They accidently killed the bear mom and rescued the bear cub. I named him Dino. My parents let Dino stayed in the house until he was bigger than me and my sister, then we gave him to the zoo.
Papa also took me and my sister camping in the woods and hiking to look and taste native wild fruits like buah celetuk (some kind of cherries) He also let me ride my bike every where in the area. I would be too scared to let my kids get into the woods alone without any adult supervision. There were no fence surrounding our compound, we were exposed to Sumatera rain forest jungle. Sometimes at school, we were not allowed to go out from our classroom because there is wild animal passing by our school, either a big boa, wild elephant, or bear and her cubs.
We visited my grandparents in Palembang so often for Hari Raya. My grandparents were lovely and humble people, my grandfather taught me how to pray and to not be afraid of anything. Nek Anang (my grandfather) sat right next to Bobo while reading newpapers and sipping coffee every morning when he visited us. Note that Bobo was the fierceful dog the neighborhood has ever seen. He was not afraid, gak tau apa jampe2nya.
Papa sent me to school all the way to grad school in the US, I know it broke his heart that I decided to stay here and eventually became a citizen and gave up Indonesia citizenship. But, he told me that I should be where my grandchildren will be raised. So he let me stay, and this is everything for me.
So Papa, you have given me so much more than a child can ever ask for. You protected me from bad dreams, from harm, from boogie man, from fever, and you always encourage me to always think that the universe is on our side as long as we ask, we shall receive.
Papa, you have given me the courage to live and experience my life, you taught me to overcome challenges with our after dinner convos. You taught me how to drink so I don't get drunk in public, you taught me how to fix a flat tire, you taught me how to make pempek lenggang panggang.
Sekali lagi, Papa, bekal yang Papa kasih ke ai itu sudah sangat2 lebih dari cukup, kalau sekarang ai bisa hidup mandiri, berbuat salah dan memperbaiki kesalahan, membesarkan anak2 disini, and masih akan berlanjut menjalani hidup sampai nanti menghadap Tuhan, semua itu karena bekal dari Papa. Jangan pernah merasa bersalah dan merasa tidak cukup untuk dalam membekali ai.
I love you, Papa!
Arlington, Lebaran hari ke 5, 2022.
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